Women's Beauty Products that I Love - A Helpful guide

I'm sharing some of the beauty products I have been using for years or that I have just discovered. For some I have had to try many others to find the ones working for me, and if I can in any way help you avoid that, I thought that I should make it available. For those products that are more obscure I will include links and for those more generic or easy to find, I will include which store to go to. I will also include the price, many times being an important factor when choosing our beauty products.



Face Products

• Facewash around $5 from Tader Joe's - in fact, my husband uses this one as well, as it is light yet effective and foamy but not too much. It doesn't dry my face and I usually use it to remove all my make up at the end of the day 

• Face cream - for this one I have two different products, one that is high end,  Nerium, which is anti-aging. I was actually introduced to it by my dad who is very much preoccupied with looking forever young (he actually already looks pretty young for his age), and being 30 years old myself I figured it's probably time to start some anti-wrinkle stuff. The day cream is light and works great underneath make up; but what's truly amazing is the Night Cream, which is actually so thick that you need to apply on damp face and rub it in. It will be kind of sleeky for a while but it drys off pretty quick. So I'm not so sure it really undid any of my wrinkles, but what it does is it heals my face really well. Also because at times I pick on my face only to regret it at the end; well with this cream it's all cleared out by morning. I've also received comments about my face looking clear and good. So if you have about $120 which is the price for both creams combined, this is the best product in my opinion. And you can order it here

• Face cream - I came across this in 2011 when a friend from Australia who is into healthy stuff had some day cream and I got to try it. Afterwards I had to order myself some more, which is actually shipped from England. I now have a night and day version of it. The day cream I buy from Amazon for abt $15 with shipping. You have to be careful with these products because shipping increases as you add more products. Sukin Day Cream Amazon The night one I also got it from Amazon but I just found a cheaper one, for $17.97 instead of the $26 on Amazon. Sukin Night Cream 

• Face Sunscreen - it was this year that it was brought to my attention that it's a good idea to wear sunscreen on my face every day when being outside. How have I missed this important piece of information throughout my life? So I tried this one from my mother-in-law who is all about sun protection. It's a bit pricier than your regular sunscreen but it's very light and it will last you for a long time, since you only need little bits at a time. I use it on top of my day moisturizer and beneath foundation and/or concealer. You can get it from Target for about $33. It can also come with a tint which may allow you to wear w/out foundation or face powder (regular one can be a bit too light for most)

• Foundation and Concealer - I really like Origins for foundation and concealer because they feel lighter than other high end stuff, but not too light as being ineffective as some too natural make-up. It's also cheaper than high end and lasts for a long time. The foundation is about $34 and the concealer $17.

Hair

• Shampoo - so I've been using this professional shampoo which my mom bought me in gallons two years ago and I'm abt half way through, but that's because I have to have at least two types of shampoos at all times. Head & Shoulders is a good one to have on hand, specially if once in a while you get flakes on your scalps, it does work for me. On a more natural, and better-for-you side, I also have Sukin Shampoo and Conditioner. I only got some because I got them randomly at a Ross for abt $7 each. And it works well, it still shampoos and does what it's supposed to do (I've had some all natural stuff before which felt like using a veggie puree on my hair, with almost no cleansing effect). 

• Serum - Another long-time-used product for me is the Biosilk, which you can apply after towel drying your hair and before blow-drying it. I really think it protects the ends well especially if you straighten your hair on a regular basis. You can buy this at discounted stores such as Ross, Nordstrom Rack or Marshalls, depending on quantity, I usually get the $10 one and it lasts for a long time since you only use a smidge each time. 

• Hair Dryer - I thought to also include this important tool because ever since I was a teenager I've had several blow-dyers burn up on me. I've always had long hair and used to have double the quantity, so it used to take a very long time to dry it, and after a year or two the dryer would burn up. Well I've had Porcelain Ceramic since 2008 and it's never given me any reasons to worry about it, and because it is professional it's stronger and more powerful cutting back on how long it takes to blow dry my hair. Average about $65 on Amazon

Perfume

• My Signature perfume is Irresistible from Givenchy. It's a nice, floral smell, not too strong but it lasts for most of the day. As a matter of fact, I like it so much that I got it twice as a gift this year for my birthday. I have an Eau de Toillette, which is the less strong one, and I use it as a day perfume. The other one is a Eau de Perfume, and being stronger I use it as my night perfume. You can buy it here for much cheaper. The website scentiments.com it's best for perfumes, many times they're cheaper because they're missing the lid or the original box because they're testers, and who would complain abt that, since testers are actually made to be stronger and last longer (so you'll need less of it per usage, lasting you even longer).

• If you want more of a granola, earthy scent (I call it my Zen perfume), I like Origins Ginger Essence. They used to have a vial of it, like a roll-on, which was around $15 and perfect for my needs. They since got rid of it and now only sell it as a full-on spray perfume for $45.

• Another calming, earthy, light one is Karma from Lush. It comes as a vial spray for abt $15 or as a balm for $10. It's also a Ginger based smell and if you usually don't do perfumes, you may tolerate and enjoy these last two ones. 

Make-up 

• Fancy stuff - I like Laura Mercier. It is pricier and you can find it in Macys  department at the mall. But it feels light and it has nice, subtle nuances. 

• Day-to-day - and if you want to keep your make-up minimal and light, I like 100% Pure. They're supposed to be made of plants and not animal tested. And unlike other such products, don't cost a bank, they're pretty reasonable and last a long time. 

• Mascara - Ok, I absolutely LOVE this one from Lancome. As a matter of fact it is the only Lancome product I would ever recommend. I first tried Defincilis Long Lashes mascara when I was a Junior in high-school, and I loved it so much that I've been having one every year ever since. It costs abt $22, but it's a great investment and it will last you a while. I use it when I wanna get all jammed-up and look my best.

• Mascara - on a day-to-day basis, when I don't need to be all jammed-up I found another good, lighter-feeling mascara, 100% Pure, abt $18 on Amazon 

• Nordstrom Rack make-up - surprisingly enough can have quite a collection, I buy my lipstick from there. I like them so much that at one point I had 4 or 5 different shades. I usually get the NYX matte stuff, which feels light and matte, duh...and it lasts for a looong time. They also have the shiny version of these ones. Oh, and have I mentioned that they only cost abt $4 each. 

Let me know if you have any more questions about any of these products, or also if you have suggestions for similar or different beauty products. 

What if We Could Both be Right?

My whole life I searched for what was right and what was wrong in every situation. I would usually listen to people around me, see what they had to say and try to understand why they thought so. I would ultimately stop and think and more importantly try to listen to how I felt about the situation, I would draw a few different conclusions and sure enough one would resonate with me over all the other ones and that’s how I knew that was truth, or at least my truth.

During my early years that process was a lot more simplistic and the conclusions were very much polarized – I saw the world as black or white, there wasn’t any grey in there. Then, as time went on and I acquired more life experience I started realizing that things were not so much black or white, and that there was a lot of grey in the world, but I still tried to reach a set conclusion and whoever saw things differently from my truth or believed differently, they had to be wrong since the conclusion I reached felt so right.

Then something happened in the last year or so. Through various, many small experiences and analyzing societal situations, I started contemplating that in a given situation both parties may very well be right while believing differently or taking opposite actions.

About a month ago I listened to an NPR story which made me solidify my assumption. A new trend started in France some time ago, the Locks of Love. This is when young couples would take a lock and close it together on a bridge as a symbol of their love. This trend caught on in various cities, such as New York, and was now catching on in Washington DC as well. Well, there was an instance where the bridge collapsed due to the heavy weight of the hundreds of locks placed on it. In order to avoid anything like that in DC, the Department of roads and bridges (or something like that, you know the one in charge with these things), went around and started breaking these locks as soon as they would be placed, so that the trend wouldn’t catch on and cause any problems. Then the moderator of the talk show had asked listeners to call in and give their two cent on who they thought was right – the young couples in love placing the locks on the bridge or the department of roads and bridges. So I took a moment and pondered this question and have quickly concluded that they are both right. That in their own sphere of existence and capacity they were both doing what they should be doing. I couldn’t condemn the young couples (the idea would be appealing to a younger me), and I couldn’t condemn the state department people who are simply doing their jobs.

I also thought that if they could both be right in this situation, then there may be other instances that both parties could as well be right. I applied same principles to more complex and serious matters, such as homosexuality. Maybe the issue at hand it’s not so much who is right and who is wrong, in other words I don’t need to decide if gay people are born that way or not, I also don’t need to approve of their lifestyle or endorse it. Maybe the reason God had allowed this same gender attraction is not to change each others’ views on the issue, but to see how we would treat each other in spite of our differences. Maybe our goal should be to have love and charity especially towards those who live and believe very differently from ourselves. 

And you know what effect it has had on me? It actually made me feel more relaxed, it took the pressure off of thinking I needed to change others around me. It validated my own truths while being willing to accept others with their own. 

 Locks of Love - Portland, Maine 2014

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How May 14th turned into May 9th - Emilia's Birth Story

It may have been the case that Emilia was going to come five days earlier anyway, but when Gigi, aka, mom and now grandma, came into town, the following day she took me shopping for…oh, about five hours.

My first strong contractions happened on Wed. May 7^th around 8:00 pm when we were shopping at our last store. I was barely pushing the cart, leaning on it for strength and to be able to walk, and I could hear but not see mom asking questions to the shop assistant. I kept yelling for her, but she couldn’t hear me. I ended up going over and telling her that I was hurting and we needed to leave right then.

That night I couldn’t really sleep, and that wasn’t new as I’ve had sleepless nights for three or four months now, but this time was different –every few minutes I felt pain. Around 3 am I went and woke up mom letting her know I was in pain. She told me it was near then, as these were contractions. I didn’t know what to make of it and I was trying to deal with it one by one. After a while I woke up Ethan too, letting him know we may need to go to the hospital, but not yet.

As morning settled in, they started to be more spread out and weak, I was even able to sleep some in-between the pain. So what did we do the morning which turned out to be my early labor – we went to get our manicure and pedicure, as that was part of the plan to do so before the baby came.

 The morning of May 8th, before leaving to get our manis and pedis. 

 I was hurting even here, although that foot massage helped some, and I walked it off a few times. The women there said that I’d better not have my baby in their saloon. 

I assured them I didn’t want that either.

Later afternoon I had a doctor’s appointment so we came home and I got ready for the appointment, starting to hurt more regularly. I even asked mom to take some pictures of my big belly as this may be the last day of my pregnancy.

 My last pregnancy pictures, the afternoon of May 8th, in front of our apartment. 

At the doctor they checked and I was only 1.5 cm dilated. I asked them if my contractions were fake, but when describing it to them, they said they sounded as being real, and that I need to wait until they were five mins apart, one minute long for an hour.

Of course mom took me shopping one more store before coming home. At her favorite store - Ross. By then I was hurting more regularly and had to sit down as she finished purchasing more stuff.

What’s interesting about being in contractions is that everything can set you off. So in my case it was mom’s driving which was bothering me. I was pretty mean to her, and she took it silently, she must have known it was the pain. Before coming home, though, we had to make one more stop, - limeade and tres leche dessert  from Café Rio.

It was somewhat comforting to drink and chew on ice. Except that when coming home and having increased contractions, I threw up all that limeade. But it felt somewhat relieving.

By the time Ethan made it home from work, around 6 or 6:30 pm I was really in pain. Each time the contractions started I screamed. But they were still not five minutes apart. We turned on the tv, watched that 70 show, the distraction helped me some. I ended up in the nursery, which felt comforting and it was motivating being in her room, using her furniture as a focus point.

We then started writing down the frequency and length of each contraction, and it was getting close. I was standing, dancing, stretching on Enigma music (my zen music), and screaming some more.

Mom suggested we should go to the hospital. Ethan insisted we needed to make sure the contractions were frequent enough, and that I had asked him for months not to take me too early to the hospital since that may sabotage my chances for a natural birth. I agreed with him, and decided to wait a bit longer.

I then threw up again, this time I could feel something inside was different - the baby was more active. I told them that we can start getting ready. When my water broke at 9:40ish pm I knew that was the time. We packed up and rushed to the car.

The drive to the hospital is only 10 or 12 min long, but it felt forever. The breeze from the outside helped some, but the pain intensified and I was screaming.

By the time we entered the hospital mom had to walk me through as Ethan had to park the car. We went upstairs to check in. I was getting angry they were actually pondering whether to check me in or not. Ethan was on the phone with the on-call doctor who was asking questions.

We had to go to a triage room as a delivery room wasn’t ready. I was checked in at 10:30pm. By now I was screaming and hanging on the advice the nurses gave me about breathing through the contractions. The doctor came and confirmed I was ready to check into the hospital. She asked me some questions to which I suggested she should just take a look at my birthplan. She then asked if I wanted any drugs, that since I had a birthplan she thought I wouldn’t. I ask what type of Epidural they administered, and whether I would be able to walk right after. She said they only administered the full-on one and that I wouldn’t be able to walk right afterwards. I looked at my mom who nodded, in saying No to her. I looked at Ethan who didn’t show any attitude towards or against it.

I then said I wasn’t planning on any drugs, and that unless the baby’s life would be threaten I wouldn’t want any. She checked me and being 4 cm dilated, she warned me I would be in labor all night and that I would most likely be delivering morning time.

Mom disagreed and having the advantage of talking with me in Romanian, said it’ll be before 4 am and not to worry, that I could do it.

They took me into the labor room; it was probably 11:00 pm by now. The nurse administered the iv as I was dehydrated and she said it would help with the delivery.  She also gave me some pointers on how to breathe. I was supposed to relax my shoulders  and breathe through what felt like high voltage going through my body, as a thunder. She said to breath like the letter J, through the contraction. I tried really hard to do just that.

Ethan and mom were close by, but during the contractions I couldn’t stand anything close to me. I would just wave them off, indicating I needed space. I started feeling as in a daze – It felt as if I was drifting.

I asked the nurse if she was going to check again to see how dilated I was. I wanted to gage how long this would take.  She said she would check me shortly. Then I asked if I should push, and she was surprise I would feel like pushing. She then checked and was almost shocked to see I was dilated at 10 cm already. She asked me no tot push so she could get the doctor. Now, I was freaked out I would deliver without them in the room.

The doctor came, around 12:10 am, and they prepared the room within minutes. The umbilical cord was twice wrapped around her neck, and they told me not to push but my body was already on automode and I did. At 12:21 Emilia came. Luckily, the stellar doctor assisting me, not even my regular doctor, but one who was on call, unwrapped it super fast. 

I knew it was over when all the sudden I could have Ethan and mom close by and enjoy their presence, the daze was over and I felt invigorated. Life had meaning again and it was all making sense.  They placed her on my chest after a light wiping. She was calm and very aware. Her eyes were big and wide-opened and she was just looking at me. It was the most amazing and rewarding experience of my life. It felt deeper and more rewarding than anything else.

 She was very much aware and present, staring straight up into my eyes. 

During the labor process I had an array of random thoughts which helped me stay motivated. First, it was thinking about God and praying to Him. I felt Him very much aware of me and of what I was going through. Secondly, I thought of my earthly dad, and about his long-standing advice that when things get tough not to give up – that everyone feels that way too, but not giving up when it feels like it will lead to success. I then thought of this NPR story I had heard days before of a guy who was blasted by a terrorist bombing in Peru. I remembered his description of the incredible pain he went through, and I thought that my pain was most likely much lower than his and that at least mine was natural. I thought of women throughout time and how they each have gone through this pain as well, and that I could do it too. I remembered images of home births from a video we watched early in the pregnancy. Ethan's encouragement towards the end to experience the pain thoroughly and feel it in the moment also made me want to do just that. It definitely paid off working on him earlier to have him on my side as a supporter. Without him and my mother I know I wouldn’t have trusted myself and the outcome might have been very different.

What I learned from my delivery experience is that if I have a big enough reason, I can attain anything. I also learned to trust my instincts and my body the most and disregard anyone else's experience or advice (even my doctors showed skepticism that I would be able to have a natural delivery). 

                                         

Emilia Noelle Kirk, born on May 9th 2014, at 12:21 am 

6 lbs 7 oz and 19.5 in (2,920 gr and 49 cm) 

Right before we left the hospital, on Sat. May 10th in the afternoon.

The Circle of Life

When my grandpa passed away I started thinking of how generations are passing on while new ones are forming. And maybe it was in response to my mourning and in a way coping with his passing that I started thinking of my future children and that our family will carry on.

Well, I am happy to report that a new little person will be joining our family, prospectively on May 14^th of 2014.

So I knew that parenthood is synonym to sacrifice, but I had no idea how early on that can start. Also, I’m not sure if I live in a land of brave women who never complain about their physical difficulties even when facing great challenges, or normal women don’t get to go through this much, but so far this BABY has been kicking my trash.

Starting with week 6 (I am a little over 13 weeks right now), I started feeling the nausea, it was bad, smells any smells felt strong and I felt like I was gonna throw up every step I took. Starting with week…9 or 10 I did start throwing up, sometimes more than once a day.

At first I was really worried about gaining too much weight, as I know it has been done before in my family. But judging on my food aversions, and the fact that even water sets me off, now I’m worried I won’t put on enough weight. And this is another thing, I’ve already started with the worrying, even if I promised myself I won’t be one of those overprotective freako moms…

So yeah, I’ll admit it, it’s been tough feeling really excited when my whole life and personality have changed. I haven't felt like doing much besides sleeping and resting, even talking tires me off. 

But that all changed yesterday, when we got our first ultrasound. The baby was at first in a sitting position and it was tough to get the needed measurements, but shortly after it started twisting and turning and doing all these movements, as if trying to impress us or something. We don’t know what it is yet, but I think it looked like a boy. We wanted a girl to begin with but it got us really excited for either or.

Our first Sonogram at 13 weeks
They never meant much before, until it was Ours. 

A few weeks ago I had to pack up all the clothes I won’t be able to wear for a while. That means I am left with maybe 30% of my wardrobe.  It’s terrible; I’ve never had such limited outfit selection. And I’m not even up to part to going shopping for more maternity clothes.

There are some good parts about pregnancy, when I can tolerate food I get to eat and enjoy it freely, with no guilt. The husband is super understanding and does most of the housework now days. Family from far away is checking in and is super excited for us. I can skip (and I do it a lot) putting on makeup and taking care of myself (especially when feeling so crappy).  Sitting down in the front seats on the metro reserved for old or needy persons, even though it’s still hard to see I’m prego, but I’m having a clear conscience knowing I don’t have to yield the seat.  

In one word, this is a whole NEW experience. I was ready for it, I had no idea it would be this hard, but it had to be done and I feel blessed to be entrusted with a special spirit to bring on this earth and to care for. Also, if my husband is still in love with me after all the puking and being so run-down, now that’s the true love I was banking on. 

If There Were no Life After Death, Then Life Would Be the Biggest Joke in Universe

Monday afternoon I got the news that my grandpa on my dad's side passed away Monday at 4 am, Romania time.

He is the first blood-related person to pass away in our family.

Vasile Alecu was born on June 27, 1939. He is the oldest son of four, and has raised 4 kids, and a few grand-kids including me. By the world's standards he didn't have much; he never went on a vacation and for most of his life lived without running water in a house of humble means.

But see, when it comes to life essentials, my grandpa should be considered as one of the richest people I know.

He had a strong work ethic, not always the smartest, but he always worked really hard. He worked for over 30 years in a tire-making factory, which gradually gave him the lung disease which caused his heart to eventually collapse. When asked by dad after he retired, how come he never looked for work elsewhere, his response was that he could never afford to take a break to look elsewhere because he needed to feed the rest of us.

He was a faithful and loyal man, was married to my grandma for 52 years.
He can be considered rich with all four of his children being married with kids of their own, healthy and settled down. He is rich because he was loved and respected by all of his children and grandchildren.

He may be a person who had the least, yet enjoyed it all the most. He was always satisfied with what was given to him. And because of this attitude he was at peace with himself and with the world, and that was apparent to the rest of us. He was also funny, without even trying it. Sometimes he would draw straight conclusions, without much investigation. This one time he first punished one of his boys, and then asked if he did indeed do what he was incriminated with. He branded numerous expressions in various situations, and he's quoted by all of us. His memory will be one of someone pleasant and desirable to have around.

Tomorrow he will be buried, and with him a small piece of each one of us.

If there were no life after death, then life would be the biggest joke in universe. If there would be no life after death, none of it makes sense. But there has to be something beyond the tangible, besides the here and now. It would make no sense being put here on earth in families, working at these relationships and growing close to each other, only to be left with a void when they're gone, and having it all be lost forever. And thanks to Christ we can all be raised again and meet our loved ones.

I have to admit it, my knowledge and understanding of it is more conceptually than experimentally. As with many other philosophical concepts, they tend to be much easier to believe and even preach when in theory. It’s in times like these that I am forced to put it to the test…and it’s hard to have that perfect brightness of hope. I hope that it will become more than just a hope, that it will become complete confidence and a deep grasping by the end of my life.

It's Never About Us

I’ve just watched on Facebook one of those videos where one person does something nice and not expected for another one, and a third one sees it and being inspired they also help someone else— and it brought me to tears (see, there are some good things on FB after all)

So I thought of why it made me feel so much emotion, and I think the answer was that at the core of each one of us it’s simply Love. That it is out nature to give and to receive that pure love. I think it touched me because something within me acknowledged that this is what truly makes us whole in life.

Ironically, we are looking so far outside of ourselves in search of that fulfillment.

This short video made me think of another FB posting the other day, a picture, which said The real question is, what have you done for those around you today? (or smtg like that).

Being moved to a new area, still searching for jobs and trying to get settled in, I almost felt justified in being self-absorbed and focused on our own things. After all, not knowing people can make it tough to do nice things for them.

But after a quick pondering on these things I realized things would be so much better if I became more aware of others and if I focused on someone else rather than being absorbed by my own challenges.

Last year I heard a story, which depicts this concept quite well.

A mother threw a birthday party for her four-year-old son. About 12 kids were gathered around the table, chatting and having fun. Then it was time to hand out to the birthday boy his presents. This other kid, Johnny, started throwing a fit, he wanted the gifts for himself, and was bothered that someone else was the center of attention. Then the mom turned to Johnny, and in a whispering, yet firm voice said: Johnny, today it’s not about you!

The moral of the story is that this applies to each one of us, for every day of our lives – it’s never about us.

Sometimes the only action needed is to BELIEVE

When you move to a new city you’ve never even visited before, two weeks after you got married, it can be a little bit intimidating and even discouraging.  Luckily I did have this really good friend who took us in for the first week.

So I have this illusion that there is one best way to do everything, that there is one best apartment we should live in, and that there is one best job I should be having, and so on … you get the picture. And because I’m wired to think that there is one optimum way or thing in everything, once I come across that one thing, I tend to get all worked up and to focus all my mental capacity and efforts towards that one thing.

Most recent such happening is with a perfect apartment we found here in our new city of residence, Arlington VA. Not only is it close to the Metro station and all the major stores one would ever need (i.e. Nordstrom, Nordstrom Rack, Bed Bath and Beyond, Costco, Marshalls, Macys and even more), but it is also so cute: hardwood floors, freshly painted walls, pretty spacious and just homey and perfect. Well since this is not good ol’ Sac town, where I never needed to apply to get a place, but went through family connections, we had to undergo this slightly stressful application process. It’s been a bit humbling and we still haven’t heard back whether is yey or nay.

As I was all worked up and a bit discouraged on Sat. I saw this quote, out of all places at the World Market. 

And I realized that sometimes all it’s required of us to get to where we wanna get, is to BELIEVE. I realized that my problem is not a lack of taking action or responsibility, but maybe having this notion that I may, somehow, have more power and can influence my environment more than I really can.

At first, it may seem almost easier to be believing rather than to take action, but I think it’s actually tougher. It’s always easier for me to make a mental or even physical list of the logical elements necessary for me to tackle and accomplish whatever it is that I want to accomplish; by contrast, having that faith which makes things happen, is to have a belief in something which by all standards you shouldn’t. And isn’t that the definition of miracles? Maybe the most impressive miracle of humanity is the potential we have to believe things out of this world.

And that’s how I backed off, relaxed some and acknowledged that I have already covered all that I could influence on my own and that the rest is up to the Universe…