My Thoughts on the Corona Virus

Year 2020 is nothing like what we have imagined!  No one could have predicted the world pandemic that has hit us. Like everyone else I am trying to make some sense of what we’re experiencing.

Does it surprise anyone else the fact that we are told to keep distance from everyone else except for our immediate family? Could it be that we have gotten away from focusing on what matters most, and instead we got busy with so many other things, maybe good things but with the price of neglecting our dear ones? What if this world pandemic has hit us in an effort from up above to nudge us into the right direction? Because I would hope that together with having no other choice but spend a lot more time around family, that we also get closer emotionally. I really think we can come out of it with a stronger family bond.

So, I know many people are freaking out and are taking the virus situation too far; I also know there are some who are dismissive of the virus and truly think we should go about life as usual. I just want to have an appropriate reaction giving what we’re dealing with, but that’s hard to know what it looks like.

Maybe it’s being prepared temporarily, within reason, which us, Latter-Day Saints have always been advised by our leaders to be. While at the same time recognize our Heavenly Father is in charge, and trust in Him all will be well.

When I read the scriptures that mention the last days prophecies it has a lot more meaning to me now. I get what they say more clearly. Even Isaiah makes sense and feels more personal to me than ever before.

I don’t think most things in life happen accidentally, and this pandemic is no exception. Maybe we needed an opportunity to learn and change both as an individual and collectively. As we are literally cutting off the outside world, we have a chance to look inward and to ponder more. When I do that, I feel peace and faith, I feel like everything is going to be alright. I hope you will feel the same too.

Power of Manifestation and Our Gender Reveal

Last month I attended a breakfast where a motivational speaker taught us about the Power of Manifestation. For anyone who may be wondering what in the world that is, here’s the Google Def. : is being able to harness your true destinies and desires in life-subconsciously put into vision, and then into reality. Everything you want of the universe is already yours-the clearer your thoughts and thinking on the matter, the more timely and precise the delivery will come.

My whole adult life, when I was asked by someone how many kids I wanted, the answer was always four kids - two girls and two boys. I’ve always said it confidently and believing it will happen. So when I was reminded about the power of manifestation concept last month, I realized I can put it to the test when I find out the gender of this fourth baby I’m carrying (already having two girls and one boy, I was still on track to be manifesting my desires).

Well, yesterday we found out the gender, and lo and behold, we’re having a GIRL. I was mostly surprised that the power of manifestation has failed me and I couldn’t understand how that was possible since I know I had done it how it’s described, by the book (without even realizing or being educated on the matter).

So I am open now to the belief that this power may either be garbage (what my dear husband has often times said to me), or that there are some things set in stone, maybe even before the world was made, that no matter how hard you try to manifest one way, it will still happen the way God has intended it.

I’ve also learned that there are some things in life, such as your kids gender, that is better left up to chance rather that become too committed to a certain outcome.

Either way, I’ve gotten more excited to having another little girl by the minute, and I am curious to see how different she will be from her sisters. (Adaline has wanted a girl from the get go, and Emilia is still in shock we’re having a girl and not a boy – this is due to me brainwashing her, we’d never discuss any girls names, but would quickly switch to boys only.) And Ellis is oblivious, probably glad he won’t be dethroned.

My social media fast – what I learned and why you should follow

Our Latter-days prophet’s admonition to take a seven-day social media fast had come to my attention, but I wasn’t going to act on it as his address was during a youth fireside and I simply didn’t think I needed to do it (even though the weeks prior to it had been some of my highest consumption of Facebook).

But my father-in-law, as he usually is very much in-tune with the spirit, at the end of our family visit a few weeks back, sat us all down and before we each left for our homes, he committed us to do just that - what the prophet had urged the young of our church to do - the seven-day social media fast as well as setting a special time aside for the Lord each week for the following three weeks.

After committing to do the fast, the first day I had to decide how to do it. Ethan suggested I erased the app from my phone, which I pondered doing so and maybe even have it permanently removed, but given the fact that I’m working towards my own product business, I know I have to keep in the loop and be proficient using the facebook app (which, btw, it had significant changes even within a week); so instead I moved the Facebook app from the first page to the very last, sitting by itself.

That helped a lot, just having it out of sight and out of mind, but out of habit I still felt like checking statuses and updates all the time in the first few days.

But here’s what I came out with as a result of my fast, also the reasons I would encourage everyone to do so even if for just one week;

• I became more present, paying more attention and in a more natural manner to my girls
• Instead of engaging throughout the day in all these group conversations, and getting distracting notifications of comments or replies to my comments, I had more clarity and quietness in my mind
• I started listening to more podcasts, even meditating and reading more meaningful texts
• I realized the people who really care know what I’m up to even when not broadcasted to the world
• I realized those people are the ones that truly matter, they are the ones that I actually talk on the phone and in person (and sadly enough, there are abt 5 of them besides family, who I talk to on a regular basis offline, one lives back in Romania, 3 are dispersed around the states, and one is in my same city)
• And what was most shocking to me - it made me so far removed from all the noise of social media, that the simple act of posting what we’re doing ALL THE TIME started feeling weird, like I stopped seeing the purpose behind it (I know there are many people who have always felt that way, and have probably laughed at people like myself, but I’m just now seeing the light).

So, obviously I’m still on FB and Instagram. I even thought about making it a two-times a week of an ordeal, almost like a chore, or a work assignment, because no one will really miss me and I will end up getting a whole lot more done in the meanwhile. But for right now, my FB app is still on the last page of my phone, and I am probably checking it about 500% less than I used to.

All thanks to a living prophet who knows our needs and has called us to take actions towards having a more fulfilled life. And just as grateful I am to my father-in-law who was inspired to have us participate.

What being Christlike in the face of same-sex marriage legalization is to me

Never in my life have I wanted to be more Christlike and never in my life have I felt less equipped with knowing what that really is. 

I know we’re taught to act and think as Christ would. And although I am well-aware of it, many times I still gossip, I still spend more time on FB than I do reading my scriptures and many more examples of sort. But when dealing with the gay marriage situation, knowing how tough it is not to become judgmental and rough on those who are gay, but also being able to hold my ground and express my beliefs, it really left me with no direction but wanting really badly to act and do as Christ would.  

But this was tough too; would Christ have changed his FB profile pic to show solidarity and support for the gay community and the recent success? Maybe, but I don’t think so. I also don’t think he would have come very strongly against all those who support it. Christ has both forgiven and mourned with the sinners and those who were weak but he has also condemned the Pharisees, calling them vipers and sons of the devil. So once again, it makes it really tough figuring out how to deal with it all.

I was notified by the recent court’s decision on legalizing gay marriage all throughout the states by my well-informed, politically-savvy husband since being in RO that didn’t really make the news and no one cares abt it over there. 

At first I didn’t think much of it, because we’ve all known sooner or later it will become the standard. But then, all the sudden my FB page was flooded with rainbow pics and praises to the recent decision. My initial reaction was to counter it with articles or opinions which sat on the opposite side, criticizing the decision. I thought that I should be pro-active at defending and promoting traditional marriage. But then I thought abt it and realized that I don’t want to be that person, especially since my interaction with the majority of my FB friends is solely online, and I know how easy it is to be miss-portrayed when limited to cyber interaction.

Then I thought I should just keep quiet and not even participate in this discussion. But I realized it mostly came  from a fear of intolerance (funny enough) from the other side for simply stating what is true and important to me. And being afraid to talk and express opinions it’s not me, nor is it why I chose to live in the United States for that matter. If expressing my views, as unpopular as they are, is being intolerant of others, then America is no longer what it was initially made to be.

Pondering on it all, some scriptures came to my mind. Passages from the Book of Mormon which talk abt if the day comes when the majority of the people choose something which is not aligned with God’s gospel, that is should be granted unto to them. So I accept the reality of it, even though we’re not even sure what the voice of the people would have chosen, since it was ultimately decided by 5 judges, but let’s say it is what most people (50% plus 1) desire in the US, I believe it should be allowed, but what does this mean to me?

I’ve never established my values and beliefs based on what was popular or praised by the world. And of course my support of marriage between one man and one woman springs from my Mormon upbringing as well as being raised in a country like Romania, but ultimately the reason I believe in it comes from how I feel abt it internally. It just feels right to me - and no laws and outside pressure can make me feel otherwise once I internalize such truths.

Now, I’m also well-aware I never felt what a gay person feels nor have I struggled with anything like it, and that’s why I don’t accuse nor condemn the stand they take, I might have done the same in their shoes. And that’s why I was left with wanting to behave as Christ would in these circumstances.

I read 3 Nephi 14 in the Book of Mormon and I was hoping to find smtg in there to give me some answers since I even taught it on my mission that the Book of Mormon holds the answers to all of life’s questions.

This chapter starts with Christ addressing the Nephites, teaching similarly to his teachings in Jerusalem. He says: Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgement you judge, ye shall be judged; …why beholdest thou the mote that is in your brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?  And I thought, this is it, I shouldn’t judge them (gays, or gay supporters), I should focus on myself and all the work I have yet to accomplish to better myself. And then I read some more: Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet.  I know the language may come across as strong and demeaning, but I think it simply means not to bring up Godly things to those who may not even believe in a God. In other words, we cannot even hold a conversation on the matter if there is no point on reference, such as you don’t believe in a higher being, who I believe has established a way of living for us which is meant to bring us higher happiness. Or you have no standards of right and wrong, so everything can go.

And then finally it was in verse 12 that hit home to me, all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them. And this is to me what being Christlike in the face of same-sex marriage legalization is.

• I desire not be judged nor demeaned because I still believe in traditional marriage, 
• I desire that people would give me a chance when they meet me rather than categorizing and rejecting me based on my beliefs, 
• I desire they don’t take it personally but consider and accept that the way I believe is a deep personal belief which has no intention of hurting or undermine who they are, 
• I desire they know and accept that I can still love them in spite of feeling differently about gay marriage. 

Applying the above principle, I also want to make sure I treat them as I wish to be treated.

I know that one day, in the eternities, we’ll look back on this and realize we all tried to do the best with what we knew and what we had, and that will be all that matters. I know God loves us all and maybe the reason we are dealing with all these issues and dilemmas, is not to try to convince each other to think and feel the same, but to see how well we treat each other in spite of strong differences. 

If There Were no Life After Death, Then Life Would Be the Biggest Joke in Universe

Monday afternoon I got the news that my grandpa on my dad's side passed away Monday at 4 am, Romania time.

He is the first blood-related person to pass away in our family.

Vasile Alecu was born on June 27, 1939. He is the oldest son of four, and has raised 4 kids, and a few grand-kids including me. By the world's standards he didn't have much; he never went on a vacation and for most of his life lived without running water in a house of humble means.

But see, when it comes to life essentials, my grandpa should be considered as one of the richest people I know.

He had a strong work ethic, not always the smartest, but he always worked really hard. He worked for over 30 years in a tire-making factory, which gradually gave him the lung disease which caused his heart to eventually collapse. When asked by dad after he retired, how come he never looked for work elsewhere, his response was that he could never afford to take a break to look elsewhere because he needed to feed the rest of us.

He was a faithful and loyal man, was married to my grandma for 52 years.
He can be considered rich with all four of his children being married with kids of their own, healthy and settled down. He is rich because he was loved and respected by all of his children and grandchildren.

He may be a person who had the least, yet enjoyed it all the most. He was always satisfied with what was given to him. And because of this attitude he was at peace with himself and with the world, and that was apparent to the rest of us. He was also funny, without even trying it. Sometimes he would draw straight conclusions, without much investigation. This one time he first punished one of his boys, and then asked if he did indeed do what he was incriminated with. He branded numerous expressions in various situations, and he's quoted by all of us. His memory will be one of someone pleasant and desirable to have around.

Tomorrow he will be buried, and with him a small piece of each one of us.

If there were no life after death, then life would be the biggest joke in universe. If there would be no life after death, none of it makes sense. But there has to be something beyond the tangible, besides the here and now. It would make no sense being put here on earth in families, working at these relationships and growing close to each other, only to be left with a void when they're gone, and having it all be lost forever. And thanks to Christ we can all be raised again and meet our loved ones.

I have to admit it, my knowledge and understanding of it is more conceptually than experimentally. As with many other philosophical concepts, they tend to be much easier to believe and even preach when in theory. It’s in times like these that I am forced to put it to the test…and it’s hard to have that perfect brightness of hope. I hope that it will become more than just a hope, that it will become complete confidence and a deep grasping by the end of my life.

Family Traditions

I am finally getting it. I've never quite understood what's going on with all these families who are trying to follow certain patterns every Christmas, Easter, Thanks Giving Day and any other occasions they find fit to follow a family tradition. I thought they did so to give them a sense of comfort and of predictability, two of some of the basic human needs.
Ironically enough, what has helped me actually get the whole tradition thing it's the Vampires Diaries....yes indeed, and although I am Romanian and Transilvania is part of Romania, this has nothing to do with that. Vampire Diaries is a TV show, I'm not even sure on what channel, which caught both my brother David and my attention about three weeks ago. We both agreed on watching that first episode all the way (we normally argue what channel to watch, he wants his MTV cribs shows, and I usually demand the news station). We both ended up liking the show, and because it ends on a climax each time, we were anticipating watching the show the following week.
Following Thursday, without even mentioning the intent of watching the show again, around 8pm David was in front of the TV letting me know the show was starting.
Now, maybe that doesn't sound like a lot, I mean any typical 15-year-old may react just like that, but knowing my brother, he is more aloof and wants to do his own thing, and since I have been gone out of the house for some time now (and the fact that I'm 10 yrs older than him), we don't have many things that we do together.
Third week of watching the show, it hit me! We have actually developed a family tradition of watching the Vampires Diaries every Thursday night. And as much as I dislike wasting time watching TV, I realized the greater thing which is behind watching the show. My brother and I are bonding...it has become our thing that we do together. This is more important to me than anything else I could be doing during that hour.
I know this is not the best example of a family tradition, but through this experience I got a little bit of the vision of what family traditions can do for us. I am committed to set my own family traditions when the time will come. I am not sure if one should sit down and decide what they should do periodically or if we should experience different activities and based on how much the family has enjoyed it to decide on making it a tradition.